Bible+Theology, Culture

Unsettling Questions: Why is sex such a big deal?

Sex is a big deal in our culture. This is nothing new.

As we work through some of life’s challenging questions in our current Unsettling Questions series, this week Pastor Chris tackles the question: Why is sex such a big deal?

For some, talking about sex can feel awkward. For others, it’s a topic that is confusing and quite painful to discuss.

It might be easy for us to assume that we know what the Bible,  or the church,  says about sex … but are our assumptions correct? Is the biblical perspective archaic and unhelpful? Or, as Chris says in his message, might God’s intentions for sex be a path worth committing to, even if it’s one less traveled in our current hyper-sexualized culture?

As with all the topics in this series, we want to encourage continued study and engagement. Here are a few of our best recommendations on the subject:

Books for Unsettling Questions


Book resources:

Sex, Lies, and the Truth by Linda L. Belleville

Redeeming Sex by Debra Hirsch

Divine Sex by Jonathan Grant

Single, Dating, Engaged, Married by Ben Stuart


People to be Loved by Preston Sprinkle

Single Gay Christian by Gregory Coles

On Pornography and Addiction:

Surfing for God by Michael John Cusick

This practical, Biblical, hope-filled study helps us discover the divine desire beneath the sexual struggle men face. The author uses examples from his own life and from his twenty years of counseling experience to show us how the pursuit of empty pleasure is really a search for our heart’s deepest desire – and the real key to resistance is discovering and embracing the joy we truly want. This comes recommended by Dave Gagnon, Pastor of Care Ministries at Blackhawk Church.

No Stones: Women Redeemed from Sexual Addiction by Marnie Ferree

No Stones is recommended by Sandra Malone, Director of Care Development at Blackhawk Church. Description from the website:  “In this book Marnie C. Ferree offers a unique resource for women struggling with sexual addiction. Taking her book’s title from the parable where Jesus extends grace to the woman caught in adultery, Ferree bravely shares her own story of sexual addiction, recalling her years of shame from living a double life and the moment when she ultimately had to tell the truth. But more than just offering her story as a hopeful example of God’s transforming power, Ferree distills her clinical expertise on female sexual addiction accessibly and gently, providing a much-needed resource for women struggling with any degree of relational or sexual addiction.”


From our Blackhawk Church event archives, check out these three sessions from our Sex and Faith event – September 23, 2016:

“Why Sex? A Biblical Vision for Human Sexuality” with Charles Yu

“Singleness, Sexuality & Celibacy” – Panel Discussion

“Sexuality & Faith, Romans 1” with author Preston Sprinkle


Previously on the blog: 

Lust: A Temporary Fix

We hope these are helpful to you as you continue learning and growing in this topic.

About the Author: Craig Gartland
Craig is Pastor of Spiritual Formation at Blackhawk and oversees Adult Ministries. He completed his Master of Divinity at Fuller Theological Seminary and spent over two decades of his career in campus ministry. He is married to Sharon and they have four children. His passions include cycling, listening to jazz music, photography, and the writings of C.S. Lewis.